Wednesday, 10 August 2011

First.




I remember the very first time I decided that I wanted to start dressing for myself, picking out my own clothes. I was 5, and I begged my mother for freedom of my own wardrobe.
It was mid summer, and I remember the street was breezy, warm and crisp: Mum advised me sensibly to dress for the weather, after too much time listening to my sobbing.
I turned off the water works and scampered up the stairs. I headed over to the chest of drawers, which my sister and I shared, I knew what I was doing. I pulled open the drawer at the bottom: it was my favorite drawer of them all as the colours in this one where the best.
It was our pyjama drawer. I rummaged around it for a little while, until I came across what I was after. It was this really cool set that 'Santa' had gifted me with for Christmas- I never really wore as really adored it and liked to keep it good- so the the bottoms were going up my leg a bit, and the sleeves were a little short. Anyway, I pulled on the top- it was this washed out shade of lilac, with violet binding along the (now slightly cropped) sleeves and cuffs. But my favorite thing about it, was the beautiful print slapped right onto the front of it. It had a picture of Ariel and Sebastian from 'The Little Mermaid' printed using a mixture of that really fun, puffy, sticky expantex pigment, and like it couldn't get any better- GLITTER.

I started to get really excited pulling on the trousers, as I was thinking about shoes and socks, and dabbling around with the idea of a watch too.
God, I loved those trousers: the same washed out shade of lilac as the top, but they had that beautiful image of Ariel and Sebastian printed ALL OVER THEM also.
I ran into my eldest sisters room, to check out how my efforts were going- Great, I really did look good- As I checked my outfit in the mirror, I noticed the trousers had gone slightly lighter in the knees, in fact, one of them had a little hole: right over Ariel's face. Rachel must have been sneaking about in them, I started to get mad: but then I caught the reflection of my big sisters new trainers in her mirror. She'd just gotten them for her birthday, they were white and had a really cool pink stripe along the sides, and smelled like candyfloss. I grabbed them and ran into my room, forgetting about the fact that my sister had ruined my most treasured possession. I went into my mums underwear drawer, I remember seeing her put my new frilly socks in there. I popped them on along with my sisters new trainers- I was so glad she was out somewhere- She really would have gone crazy if she knew I was wearing them. I don't even think she'd had them on yet.
I remember feeling extremely satisfied at my efforts. I mean, I really did look great. Well I definitely felt a million dollars.

I ran down the stair to show my mum- making sure to be careful so the shoes didn't slip off, as they were a little loose- I felt so smug.

My mum looked at me disapprovingly with disgust, and requested I change into the shorts she'd left on her bed for me. I ran outside and sat on the kerb in the sun, sweating just a little as the fleece from the inside of my pyjama top was probably intended for winter wear.


What was I thinking.


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